5/21/2014

this boy.

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today i am one proud mama.

it could be pregnancy hormones but my heart tends to overflow lately. you know, where it really threatens to burst at any given moment because it's just so darn full. it's almost ridiculous.

being a parent is hard, i don't think that's a secret. being a mom has been the most fulfilling thing i've ever done, sure, but also the hardest thing i've ever done. it's just this roller coaster ride of really hard times and really good times, and i'm not naive about any of that. but the truth is that at the end of every day, no matter how hard it was, i lay in bed at night and think about how much love i have for this boy of ours.

not a week ago now we made the move to the big boy room, fully equipped with a new big bed. he was so excited about the whole thing and didn't so much as shed a tear about leaving the nursery behind. i fully anticipated a transitional period, waking up in the nights and needing time to get used to it all. but instead the transition was smooth as butter, not even a hiccup i tell you! he slept soundly through that first night and has ever since. he hasn't even fallen off the bed.

and then there is the potty training, which was long and hard and then oh the rewards after long and hard! all week has been amazing, no more accidents and always telling us when he needs to "go to da toy-wet, i hab to poopy!". my mama pride piggy bank just keeps on getting bigger and bigger and bigger.

he wants to do everything himself these days. "don't help me mom!"

he pretends his bicycle is a motorcycle and he does flips and tricks with his wild imagination.

he gives me big mushy kisses on command.

he uses his goofy personality to make me laugh until i'm crying. and then he feels bad that i'm crying.

he politely always says "pwweease" and "dank you!" and "i'm sorry mom"

it's true that it's bittersweet to watch them grow up so fast, our littles, but it's also very exciting isn't it? the heart wrenching kind of exciting that is motherhood. i love watching him grow and mature because, well by golly he is really turning into the kind of boy i would dream to have raised. he's so sweet, so tender hearted and sensitive. he's strong willed and stubborn in all of the ways that will make him an amazing leader one day. he is loving and kind, and don't you think that's one of the very most important things to teach a child to be? he has such a fun personality with a grand sense of humor and the most contagious laugh. he is adventurous and outdoorsy and sporty and fun-loving.

it's so hard, this parenting thing. i always wonder if maybe i'm doing it all wrong. and then something really clicks. it really just comes together like a school science project that you stayed up all night long to prepare perfectly. and in that moment-after all of the stressing, all of the worry, all of the tears and sweat-i see a small glimpse of this final project and sometimes i wonder...well shoot, maybe we are doing something right after all.

i'm so proud of him. everyday i'm proud of him. i think the transition of sharing the spotlight with a new baby is going to be tough on him, but given his track record i also think that he's going to surprise us with how well he will handle it. and i know without a doubt in my mind that he's going to be one amazing big brother.

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